RANT || YES MEANS YES

This post is a little different so bare with me!! I was reading a BBC article today on a 19 year old victim recently –  who was drunk and raped in Manchester. I had so many thoughts reading this and thought I would just do a quick little rant of my views surrounding this!

This particular case in Manchester led to controversy as the judge stated that women’s drunken behaviour was putting them at risk. Not only this, but women should be careful and weary of the way they behave.

My first reaction was to be angry because in my mind, rape is never the victim’s fault. A person could be lying naked on the floor, or in someone’s bed or be in a state of unconsciousness – it does not give anyone the right to rape or sexual assault. Both women and men should be free to behave however they want to without fear of being sexually assaulted.

There was an instance a couple years ago that caused major outrage – when Miss USA, Mia Sanchez, put forward her idea that the way to stop rape and sexual assault in colleges was to teach women to defend and protect themselves. It was argued that giving women ‘rape prevention help’ was condoning rape as otherwise – we would teach men not to rape. dont-rape.jpg

On the other hand, we have to be realistic. This is the world we live in and perhaps people, especially women, need to be careful and need to be aware of the dangers and the risks of getting themselves drunk. As much as we’d like to say that women and men should be free to behave how they like when having fun – there are awful people out there and we can only do so much to stop people from sexually assaulting.

Recently I have been reading a book by Jaclyn Friendman called “Yes Means Yes: Vision of Female Sexual Power and a World Without Rape” which talks all about the idea I touched on previously. The law and concept should not be ‘No means no’ because so often the victim is not in a state to say no – and ergo; yes means yes. Just because the victim is dressed in a certain way; just because they may be drunk; just because they didn’t say anything or fight back; just because you like each other – that doesn’t mean yes – ONLY YES MEANS YES!51U26dtevYL.jpg

The ‘Yes Means Yes’ campaign has literally become one of my favourite movements that have mainly been focussing on sexual assault on campuses – and I couldn’t be happier to see it instated more and more across America because I think it’s too important.

SERIOUS POST OVER!! Let me know what your thoughts are, I’d be so interested to read them! Have a lovely daayy!! xxxx

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13 thoughts on “RANT || YES MEANS YES

  1. I 100% agree with you and the Yes means Yes campaign however I do believe there are grey areas and situations that are difficult to determine when alcohol and drug use are thrown in the mix.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That’s a really good point – that makes it especially difficult to determine what exactly happened in order to be able to sentence the person etc. – thanks so much for your comment angela!!! xx

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Yes! I am so for a serious post now and then and this is something that 100% needs to start being taught even from a young age. Women and girls should be able to; act freely, not be scared that they will be judged after something so horrid and learn to protect themselves. Men and boys must also be taught that it is wrong and not to do it!
    Personally I love the ‘cup of tea’ analogy.
    Great post as always! x
    https://livelaughlib.com

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I know I was worried because it’s not what I normally post but I’m so glad you’re all for it!! WOOO!! and Yes!! and same works the other way round too with both boys and girls not having to worry about being judged etc. THANK YOU for your comment my deaarrr!!! always makin me smileeee ❤ xxx

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I 100% agree with everything in this post. Consent should be taught in schools, as well as self-defense tips because you can never be too careful. However, there will always be creepers out there, teaching about consent doesn’t really change that. Ideally, though, a good education could stop the majority of this rape epidemic we seem to have at college campuses around the globe. I liked reading this post, keep it up 😊

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Such a topical and important issue to discuss. Sexual assault, especially on college campuses, and not victim blaming is so so sooooooo important to talk about! A sentiment that I always carry with me is: yes is not the absence of a no, and I think that really fits into what you’re talking about here! If you haven’t watched the documentary, The Hunting Ground, I highly recommend it. Great post, Jo! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I totally 100% agree with you that it should never be the victims fault. But again, its so controversial with the many variables that effect the situation which make it that much harder to discern and punish the perpetrator. It really breaks my heart for those who get into these situations and the abuser just gets away with it. It’s wrong and sad. And whats even more sad is the fact that this is the world we live in and that there will always be those creeps out there who just don’t care and take advantage to which it’s completely out of our control. So I think for women its just very important to be aware, cautious, and stick with someone you trust because a lot of the times it can be preventable. I think it’s great that you’re sharing and shedding light to a matter that is definitely concerning, very bold Jo! ❤

    xo, JJ

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Omg literally I know this might be weird but I always see your name come up and it makes me happy because I always love your comments hehe nothing makes me more angry than when the perpetrator gets away with it but you’re so right with everything you’ve said!!! Aw thank you so much that means everything!❤ xxxx

      Liked by 1 person

  6. This is such a serious issue so I was super glad to see someone use their media platform to spread a message. A lot of shitty things always happen and it’s unfortunate but hopefully sometime in the near future all this negativity and hate and violence will just be gone. Yes means yes is a very powerful message, and I’m glad that I came across it. Thank you sm for sharing x

    Liked by 1 person

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