So I thought I would do something a little bit different. I’ll probably come to do a lot of ranting posts like this one so maybe just grab a snack and STAY WITH ME! Hopefully this makes at least one person in the world inspired or helps them realise something because that would be incredible.
I’ve been thinking recently that this year, and over the last couple years, that I’ve been a lot happier than I ever have been. Now I’m sure there could be a lot of factors to why this might be the case but this post is going to be specifically on self confidence.
I’m someone who as part of my job and as part of my interests finds myself on social media a lot. Whether it be Facebook, Twitter, Instagram or Tumblr..I’ll be on it in the morning, throughout the day and right before bed. Probably not a good thing but hey! Going through Instagram posts or any social media post for that matter, it becomes very easy to start comparing yourself to people. It becomes very easy to start comparing yourself to those girls especially, who seem to have their life together eating avocado on toast, with their nails always done and make up always on point. I’ll admit I was one of these people who allowed myself to feel down when I didn’t look like them. Not only this, I was one of those people who let what other people say about me make me upset for days on end. I did everything to avoid being disliked, even if it meant putting up with people that were horrible to me.
I went through a period of little self belief however over the last couple of years (thank the heavens) have managed to overcome this and I’ve managed to learn so much. So hopefully for anyone who may still be in this period in their life, here are a few things I’ve learnt:
- These seemingly perfect girls on social media ALL, I repeat, ALL have as many insecurities as you do. They ALL have days that they feel and look like potatoes. We’re all a potato at some point in our lives, its just normal. And even if there is someone out there who is beautiful and stunning and all of that, THAT DOES NOT MEAN in any circumstance that there is an absence of beauty in you. You might not always be a fan of how you look but I promise you there is someone out there who would kill to look like you. That will always be the case.
- SECONDLY! Now anyone I know reading this, will know that I used to do this literally everyday of my life but I’ve learnt it’s the worst thing you could possible do – and that’s to think negatively. This is the first step; stop thinking negatively and stop putting yourself down. If you go into a job interview and you say you’re going to do badly, then I’m sorry but you’re GOING to do badly. You have to be able to believe you can do something and you have to tell yourself that you can do it whether other people agree or not.
- Which brings me to point THREE, screw people! (Not in that way..) One of the biggest things I’ve learnt is to not waste time on negative people. Get rid of any negativity in your life and that includes anyone that doesn’t make you happy and doesn’t treat you how you should be treated because honestly there is just zero time for that. The amount of times I have stuck around horrible people thinking I could change them.. YOU CAN’T. I used to believe that my worth could be decreased based on what other people said or thought about me and I could not have been more wrong and I could not be happier to be free from that mindset!!
Having said all this, confidence is not to be mistaken by cockiness. Confidence is feeling happy with yourself and loving yourself – and most importantly being okay with it even if other people might not. It’s being able to compliment another girl knowing that in no way does that take away the beauty in you. Cockiness on the other hand is believing you’re great by putting other people down and this is just a big no no. I don’t get why people feel the need to do that or how they even have it in their heads to do such a thing.
There are so many things to do to help work on confidence, even if they’re tiny things. They don’t have to necessarily be physical things because I know mediation is supposed to be incredible and so effective, but for me it makes me feel better even when I spend ten minutes doing a face mask or getting my nails done. It always nice sometimes to be a little selfish and spend time on doing something foryourself.